haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize