He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize
