I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I deserve this hangover.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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