i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
