Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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