Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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