Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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