i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
