You're completely useless in the revolution.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
