i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
