He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
