one two three fourrrrnication!
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I understand Curling. That high.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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