you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
