Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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