I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
