he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Boobs speak an international language.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I am mentally ready for anal.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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