its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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