That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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