i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
