see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
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