Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Why did my mother make you get naked?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
