what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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