My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
