We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
porn star boner night. come get it.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Randomize
