She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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