wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
