How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
