i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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