So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Randomize
