this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
