so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Randomize
