I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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