you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
