Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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