Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(216): View more from Ohio

My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.

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(240): View more from Maryland

oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.

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(305): View more from Florida

Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.

(786): View more from Florida

How high are you right now..

(305): View more from Florida

I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.

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(516): View more from New York

until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life

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(765): View more from Indiana

I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out

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(972): View more from Texas

I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.

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(650): View more from California

we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.

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(996): View more from

I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.

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