I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I need to sanitize my soul.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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