put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
