Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
