Hey man sorry I got all grabby
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
