did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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