your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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