what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
