I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize