Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
