i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
