can we get nightvision for the apartment?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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