I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
so much tequila, so little girl.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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