Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
