haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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