your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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